This Is The Only Moment There Is.

Realize deeply that the present moment is all you ever have. Make the NOW the primary focus of your life. Eckhart Tolle in The Power of Now Immediately after Jim’s death I anchored myself in the present moment. Both the past and the future were too painful for me to think about. My memories of... Continue Reading →

Showing God

Tau Healing Arts

When your burden is heaviest, you can always lighten a little some other burden. At the times when you cannot see God, there is still open to you the sacred possibility, to show God; for it is the love and kindness of human hearts through which the divine reality comes home to people, whether they name it or not. Let this thought, then, stay with you: there may be times when you cannot find help, but there is no time when you cannot give help.

— George S. Merriam

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From the first day, Hanalei was a daddy’s girl; they had an immediate bond. After Hanalei was born, I stayed home with her so my life followed a structured routine around feedings, nap time, bath time & over packing the diaper bag whenever we left the house. A routine every new parent knows well. I remember... Continue Reading →

Wild and Crazy

In February, I began a grief therapy workshop that lasted 10 weeks. On the first night, I had to write what my intentions were for the class, what I hoped to get out of it. I wrote, I want to live for myself as much as I am living for Hanalei. When I was at Jim’s bedside... Continue Reading →

Gifts 

One of the gifts I've discovered in dealing with loss is that I have equanimity in dealing with life's problems. Things that used to stress me out don't. I have a new perspective on what is important and what is worth getting stressed over. This can make it hard to relate to other people. Those... Continue Reading →

Find a Way

It is humbling how a single traumatic event can bring real perspective to life choices. I have always been a planner. Not just a planner but my brain looks for shortcuts in everything. I am constantly calculating the most efficient way to do things. I had a plan for dating, the wedding, married life, what... Continue Reading →

This is How I Rise.

The last year of my life has been wrought with fear. From the moment we sat face to face with the oncologist and she told us that Jim had a tumor in his brain that was hemorrhaging. Every action that we took from that moment forward was based on fear. We were in crisis mode.... Continue Reading →

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